A five-year-old boy was mowing his front lawn and drinking a beer. The preacher who lived across the street saw the beer and came over to harass the kid.
"Aren't you a little young to be drinking, son?" he asked.
"That's nothing," the kid said after taking a swig of beer. "I got laid when I was three."
"What? How did that happen?"
"I don't remember. I was drunk."